I haven't been on this Earth for very long, but boy, I've gotta tell ya... there are some stupid-ass motherfuckers walking around this place! I know that as humans, we all make mistakes, but when did being a moron become a fad? It's moronic to act like a moron, and it is not, is never was, and it never will be "cool" or "hip" to be a dipshit. Acting like a dipshit can be funny, but actually being a dipshit means nothing but bad things for the world as a whole. What makes it even more astounding is that I'm not actually exclusively talking about children and their usually-retarded behaviour; there are just as many -- if not more -- dopey adults who make up part of the human population, whose retarded actions aren't excusable via lack of age or personal experience! I don't take myself to be a genius; I make mistakes and mess up all the time, but the number of times I think "wow, that's fuckin' stupid!" is far more often a reference to what someone else did rather than what I did.
Prime example: I was watching a news story online (which is a great source of moronic material by default :P) and the report was about a double-shooting that had occurred in Sydney. According to the source, the perpetrator went in to the victims' apartment complex, went up to his apartment, got in one way or another, had a heated discussion with one of the victims, and shot him in the stomach. The other (soon to be) victim tried to escape by climbing over a balcony railing and making his way to the ground, only to have a cap quite literally popped in his ass. In spite of all of this, the victim and his dual-hole buttocks, rather than calling an ambulance or the police, or at the very least asking someone else for help... decided to go down to the local cafe shop and have a nice cup of holy-shit-I'm-bleeding-out-my-arse latte. Only when the cafe staff noticed the blood dripping out the guy's arse did the paramedics and coppers get involved.
So, let's get this straight: this guy has taken a bullet to the behind, and decides that coffee will make this all go away... what!? First, let's start with the obvious: if you've been shot, and you don't call an ambulance or the police, you've probably got something to hide :P Why the fuck would you want to delay the removal of a round in your keister, let alone attempt to sit down on it in a cafe? That's just giving yourself away, that is :P Not to mention what a dick his flatmate thinks he is now; he didn't even get help for his friend! Tsk tsk tsk. What gets me is that he went to... a cafe... to get coffee... WHAT!? Coffee is full of caffeine! Caffeine is a stimulant; it would make the pain worse! I can understand one going to a bar to try and numb the pain with alcohol -- this makes far more sense, albeit still being a relatively stupid idea :P -- but why would you want to make your nervous system even more alert given the situation!? Dumb cunt is dumb; let us proceed :P
In a more general sense, I'm really getting sick of stupid people asking even stupider questions. The Internet is made up of a giant pile of stupid people and a giant pile information, and they can't find one another because the populace consists primarily of lazy, unenlightened douchebags inherently incapable of thinking properly. There are two types of shitty questions: the ones that have a simple, objective answer that you can find with a Google search are the most prominent. Why are people incapable of using a search engine? "Where do I get this item in LittleBigPlanet? What's the level where you find this prize bubble in?" HOW IN THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW!? HOW!? WHAT AM I; A LITTLE BIG ENCYCLOPAEDIA? LOOK IT UP, YOU DAFT TWAT! Woah; all caps! I'd better drink some coffee to calm my mad self down :P
Then there are the questions that are so vague, an answer only results in a follow-up question that's slightly more specific, but still far too general to answer properly! I was recently asked "how do i make machines tht move with the controllernater?" Well, assuming "controllernater" means "Controlinator," the answer is... "you hook the buttons and sticks up to whatever you want them to do." Would that help them? Not really! It depends on what machine it is, what buttons you want to do what, and how the rest of your level is designed -- I'm not as psychic as these people think I am, nor are answers to these questions going to help these poor fuckers. People tend to ask these questions when they think it's appropriate to skip all forms of experimentation and just take the easy way out, evident by the fact that they come to the table with no information for you and no experience to share with you. Here's a tip: try some shit first, then come and ask questions! Perhaps you should find and take in relevant information that's already out there, proceeding to try to apply it to what you're doing; you know, being self-reliant!
Thankfully, a lot of these questions come from children, who are morons by nature, and whose learning ability is at such a high that they can (hopefully :P) learn quickly not to do this again in the future... yeah, and maybe that nitwit having metal surgically removed from his rectum can learn how not to look like a criminal. Some say the very definition of insanity is trying the same thing twice and expecting a different outcome; I associate such a definition with idiocy, but I suppose it fits the other i-word just as well. We've all been there, and we all know that were were full of questions back then, as well as the fact that those questions were outright stupid sometimes :P I question the new generation and their ability to learn, however... they just seem so dumb! Am I just a judgmental, conceited dickhead, or am I expressing a serious and shared concern here?
I thought everyone's ability to learn would last them a lifetime... looking at these new guys... perhaps I was wrong...
No comments:
Post a Comment